Yet this doesn't necessarily mean that finding a sense in our lives will make us happy. Because when we are satisfied with ourselves, we don't feel the need to question ourselves on this subject. If we are unhappy, on the other hand, we will rather try to find actions to take to attain happiness. In fact, since no-one decides that they will be born, no reason explains our existence.

In fact, those who adopt and base their lives on beliefs or philosophies, establish a loving relationship through the interposed person. They live according to the principles selected by those who imagined the dogmas of a spiritual group. Yet this way of seeing life results in deactivating the spontaneous behaviors and thus reducing the possibility for an exchange of affection in a couple. Elsewhere, beliefs are attached to our rational side and not to our spontaneous one.

In our society, there are a large choice of beliefs and schools of thought which are not attributed to a specific religious sect, but which, still the same, are part of our culture. In fact, no domain concerning human beings is exempt from beliefs, whether it is medicine or psychology. These beliefs exist because society is unable to help people ease their suffering.

But since our suffering mainly comes from a lack of love during childhood, this explains our difficulty in developing a life as a healthy couple. Consequently, disappointments in love follow one after another, making us more and more unhappy and frustrated in life. So the more that we are unhappy in life, the more we attach to the principles and values circulating in society to avoid falling into a depression.

Inversely, a adult is happy if they received affection from their parents throughout childhood. They have more of a chance of experiencing a satisfactory relationship as a couple which will make them even more happy. So the success of a couples relation lies mainly in the affection exchanged. In fact, it is the main source of well-being and pleasure for human beings. If we can't explain the reason for our existence, we can always learn to get the most out of it. We are spontaneously born with the desire to live which is intrinsically motivated by pleasure. So a person who is unable to get any pleasure out of life will develop self-destructive behaviors which will lead to suicidal tendencies.

By this, we can say that life is a drug in the sense that we become dependent on activities which give us pleasure. In fact, our states of well-being are induced by a drug which our body produces naturally, a hormone called endorphin, and which is essential to our psychological and physical health. Yet the lack of affection makes us suffer psychically. Suffering is thus explained by a reduced production of endorphin. Since life is essentially a quest for pleasure, we can be led to use drugs and alcohol to live out fake pleasures when you are unhappy. However, consumption of these substances is dangerous to our physical health and this doesn't help solve personal problems.

Even if we did not have loving parents, it is possible to work on becoming happier. We must master our emotions with our rational mind in order to choose behaviors and activities which give us pleasure and well-being. For example, by respecting and loving women, by not blaming ourselves, by paying attention to our health and by regularly taking part in physical endurance activities. In other words, we must find ways to increase our production of endorphin and become dependent on its effect. Thus, an exchange of affection pushes our body to produce a lot of endorphin.

On the other hand, artificial drugs like crack can make us violent, while endorphin makes us gentle and loving in addition to making us happy. It influences our thoughts and actions in a positive way towards woman. A man who is happy can not be a misogynist since that is the expression of an immense problem with living. In addition, misogynists suffer too much to abandon themselves to an exchange of affection and they have a strong tendency to commit conjugal violence. As a result, most of them have drug and alcohol problems linked to their suffering.

Lack of pleasure is responsible for violence and human misery in general in society, like for example, existing rivalry between men and women. This is usually expressed between men and women who suffer. So certain women carry the flame of feminism to express their bitterness towards the behaviors of misogynists. Motivated by their unhappiness, they poorly defend a women's cause. They are too emotional when it comes to men's violence, they are upset by the littlest word which seems degrading to them, they develop an exaggerated distrust and they have a negative image of men. They form a ghetto of suppressed women by isolating themselves in this way from men. This type of victimization behavior is linked to the feeling of fear which it implies. In fact, a woman desiring to leave the consequences of a relationship of conjugal violence must quit acting as the victim (victim one day, but not for always). Thus by maintaining their fear of men, they cut themselves off from the pleasure of an exchange of affection which they can obtain in a future relationship and which is essential for their psychological health. As a result, she will suffer even more.

On the other hand, women lucky enough to experience a relationship with an affectionate man defend the women's cause better by confirming their need to be loved and considered. All while knowing how to recognize and appreciate gentle men, they avoid being affected by misogynist comments by becoming part of the things. In fact, they have learned to commensurate with the suffering of these misogynists, without perceiving all this as a conspiracy organized against them.

As a result, the feminine cause will take a big step ahead when there will be more happy men. Since the majority of men experience a deficit in affection concerning their childhood; they all should take an active part and learn to be affectionate in a relationship with their partner or with their children. Thus, we can contribute to ending the misery which goes from one generation to the other. Yes, it is possible to transmit love to our children, even if we didn't receive it from our own parents, as long as we make an effort to get out of this cycle. Then, our children can, in turn and spontaneously, make our grandchildren happy and so on.

I wrote this book because I deeply love women. And I believe that in sharing my experience, my knowledge and my ability to reflect to help men become more affectionate, more women will be happy and consequently there will be less victims of violence and discrimination in society.

In considering that nature is always evolving towards something better or more adapted, violent tendencies don't appear to be winning. Rather it is what gives us pleasure which makes us evolve. Thus, it is the gentle and affectionate men who get the most out of life. The only alternative is thus to choose happiness by loving women.

On another train of thought, the cult of thinness shows the presence of institutionalized misogynists in our actual society. It is easier to manipulate and abuse people who suffer. In fact, individuals or groups who possess economic power can influence values of society at their will and thus obtain their financial goal. Americans have spent 33 billion dollars in 1994 to try to get thin. This terror of being thin makes the majority of women unhappy. In fact, how can a women feel comfortable with herself all while depriving herself from eating? A woman's identity is intimately linked to a woman's curves. Consequently, promotion of thinness is the most degrading thing that there is for her. Obviously, when we hate women, we reject the image that their body has. Thus, a thin woman doesn't resemble neither a woman nor a man, but rather a child. Children however do not represent a menace for misogynist power.

Yet, a woman's curves have great power on our unconscious behaviors. Misogynists, desiring women to be submissive, refuse this power and look for thin women to better dominate them. Reading personal want ads show just how many men hate women. Those who write, "Fat people abstain, weight proportional to height, thin, agreeable appearance" want in reality an inflatable doll to masturbate with. These are the men unable to initiate or be a part of a relationship and exchange affection. In fact, they would be better off getting a prostitute rather than trying to find their soul-mate.

Elsewhere, the value thinness equal beauty reflects just how much people are unhappy in society. The importance of this value is proportional to the level of violence that women are subjected to. This value is maintained by men so that they can have control over women by making them go on diets to be thin, in order to have the chance to find a partner. This can be compared to the removal of the woman's clitoris required by men in Muslim countries so women can find a husband. Conjugal violence starts from the moment when the woman no longer receives affection from their partner.

In the same line, 98% of the time pornography uses thin and young looking women. This choice is justified by the goal it seeks, that is the promotion of a model of sexuality, where feelings are not considered. Thus, the only pleasure that we should strive for is ejaculation. From this view, it is unthinkable to envision that a man can face the emotions that a curvaceous woman's body gives off. These are too strong and troubling, in fact, it's through emotions that the sexual power of the adipose tissues acts upon. It is easier to pass over feelings with a thin woman in order to abuse her.

Curves are at the origin of well-being by enabling affectionate behavior. In order to receive a woman's affection, we must be able to give in to the emotional effects of the adipose tissues. This implies that if all women were thin, we all would be unhappy. In fact, a very small percentage of women are normally thin. According to Statistics Canada, 18% of women are so thin that they are in danger of compromising their health compared with four percent of men. This signifies then that 14% of women are mutilating themselves with diets in order to conform to the requirements of misogynists while in reality, there should only be four percent of naturally thin women. Going back to the point made at the start of this paragraph, we can say that the majority of men who appreciate curvaceous women are gentle and affectionate. On the other hand, women who are aware of the happiness that they transmit to others with their curves has immense joie de vivre. This is such that our body, in contact with curves, will secrete lots of endorphin.

The day when plump women are considered to be the prettiest and the sexiest, then there will be more happy couples. In fact, promoting feminine curves is also promoting the importance of affection in the relationship. Parents who are affectionate with each other are also this way towards their children. For a child to become a psychologically well-balanced adult, affection is essential. If the majority of people were receiving affection in our society, then there would be less problems with violence, real equality between sexes and less human misery in general.

Since some people achieve artistic and literary creations while on drugs, those on endorphin can also create things. In fact, creation is usually done in a state of pleasure and well-being. But the hallucinogenic effect of drugs doesn't guarantee the quality of creations. These can thus be the expression of destructive emotions, like, for example in contemporary jazz where a heavy atmosphere is created or in philosophy books, where women are degraded. The low quality of creations is explained by the fact that the pleasure that the creator is searching for is artificial and aims at numbing their suffering.

Besides, happy people do not need drugs to obtain pleasure. Under the effect of affection, they can create more constructive and agreeable things which can help society evolve. Music, painting and poetry created under the influence of endorphin are, as one can imagine, masterpieces. All we have to do is compare the works of Auguste Renoir and Paul Gauguin to understand this. The latter painted his paintings under the influence of morphine; they gave us the impression of roughness and confusion. Yet Renoir's paintings, give us the impression of gentleness and joie de vivre.

In everyday life, our exchanges of affection put us in a permanent state of pleasure, which improves our mind's state of readiness. Thus, this helps us be more productive at work, find solutions to our problems, be more sociable and profit from the littlest pleasures that life gives us. We become amazed by observing natures beauty, like sunsets. The more that we are affectionate towards our partner, the more we feel like we are in love. Being in love is a high or a state of nirvana which makes us calm and joyous. That means that we act wisely and with a smile on our face. The Buddhist monks were so mistaken when they looked for a state of ecstasy and wisdom through solitary activity such as meditation and yoga. In fact, the only activity which raises us to a higher level of conscience is an exchange of affection.

The more that we are affectionate, the more we feel good and the more we want to stay that way. Our partner is the most important person because they are our main source of pleasure, which spontaneously pushes us to be respectful and attentive. A loving man is thus a drug addict who floats on endorphin vapors. It is a state of ecstasy which gives meaning to his life. Nature pushes us to desire pleasure because it is part of the strategy of evolution.

When affection is won, everything is won. In fact, we have lots of plans, we are motivated to learn and to discover new things. Also, we don't worry about tomorrow, we don't have stress or anguish. With the pleasure of affection, we go ahead in life confidently.

So, the exchange of affection is the most important element in the life of a human being. We must do everything possible so this occurs. In this sense, we must first develop love for women in general, then learn to emotionally abandon ourselves. For this, we must experience life and take some risks. For example, go to a psychotherapy session, read psychology books, go to human relations conferences, take personal growth courses and take part in exchange groups with men to share our experiences.

Finally, by the affection that they can give us, women are priceless. They are the greatest, most fantastic and the most amazing people there are. It is natural to have unlimited admiration for them. Nothing is more important than the relationship that we have with our partner. We must give all of our energy and imagination to take care of her. All the love that we give our partner is essential to our health and to obtain a good quality of life in general.